Rejection. A different take.
Jesus was rejected so we are all in good company. Rejection is something every person breathing has experienced on some level. It is the one thing we all have in common no matter our gender, age, educational level, or economic or social status.
Rejection does not respond to reason. It obliterates our self esteem and self worth. It is like a B movie that is so bad, yet we continue to play it over and over again in our mind. It can cause us to go hide under the covers with our best friends, Ben & Jerry. Interestingly, when seen under an MRI, rejection illuminates the same areas of the brain as physical pain.
Rejection often leads to self criticism and the pain is often deeper than anticipated. Rejection is a deep, emotional pain that has the very real possibility of sidelining your faith—and your life. It can be one of the worst forms of abuse we inflict on ourselves.
But let’s consider it from a different angle. What if rejection in its purest form (not its distorted reality) is a blessing in a different wardrobe? A point of rejection that you encounter actually could be the foundation for your future. Not the rejection per se, but the response and outcome of the rejection. It could be the greatest set up for your finest moment.
Your response to rejection will change the trajectory of your life. Rejection gives you an opportunity to prioritize. It reveals who you really are and who your true friends really are. It can reveal a new season in your life that makes room for the better God has for you on the horizon.
Sometimes rejection comes on a path where everything seems to be so God, then poof! It’s what I call “rejection redirection.” God uses a painful moment to set us on the path to fulfilling our destiny. I know many of you can look back at a point of rejection and, when you have a different vantage point, see God’s rejection redirection hand on your life. Maybe you were saved from a horrible relationship. Maybe you were fired only to land a better job. Maybe God moved you to a new location due to a bad situation only to set you up for a life you never knew could exist. Maybe your divorce saved your life and the lives or your children.
Okay, those are obvious. But there also is rejection redirection that make us wonder. Why did someone we love die? Why did I have to experience a hard breakup? Why did I get sick? Why am I not married? Why can’t I have children? Why was I abused? I am not sure we ever get the answers to these tough questions! God doesn’t always provide those details. In fact, He rarely does. Why is that? He wants our relationship with Him to be based on trust, not explanations. Ouch! That is just a hard pill to swallow.
I had to learn this in my personal life. When both of my children died in the womb and my dream of becoming a mother evaporated, I had to decide if the pain of rejection that was leading to regret was going to define me or refine me. While I still have no answers in the natural, I have found the resolve to not allow fear and doubt to hold me back from the plan of God for my life.
It comes down to shifting our perspective.
So, no matter what you are facing today, no matter the pain you have experienced, I encourage you to look at rejection through a different lens. Rejection is never going away. It is something we all will deal with until we go home to be with the Lord. But your view of rejection can change. Your response to it can be altered. Instead of fear being your master and regret holding you back, speak with authority to the rejection in your life and say, “No more!” You are not going to hold me down or hold me back. My setbacks are going to be set ups for the authentic life I am destined to live. Then TRUST GOD—and choose to forgive the one who rejected you, not because he or she needs it, but because it is essential for you to experience “rejection redirection” in your heart and help you become the most healthy version of who you were created to be.